Stop Filling in the Blanks

In today’s fast-paced world, silence has become a rare commodity. We’ve grown so accustomed to the constant hum of activity that the instant we find ourselves waiting in line, sitting in traffic, or with a spare moment, we impulsively reach for our phones, turn on the TV, or blast music — anything to avoid facing the discomfort of empty space. As spiritual teacher Eckhart Tolle observes in his book The Power of Now, “All the misery on the planet arises due to a personalized sense of ‘me’ or ‘us’,” which is constantly reinforced by the mind’s compulsive thinking.

However, science is now validating what spiritual traditions have long known — that this constant mental stimulation is taking a toll on our well-being. A study published in Science found that participants would rather administer electric shocks to themselves than be alone with their thoughts for just 6–15 minutes.1 This aversion to “blank” time keeps us trapped in a state of chronic stress and unease, as we never allow our nervous system to fully relax.

The antidote to this modern malaise is mindfulness — the simple yet profound practice of bringing our attention to the present moment without judgment. As Vietnamese Zen master Thich Nhat Hanh teaches in The Miracle of Mindfulness, even the most mundane tasks like washing dishes become opportunities for meditation when approached with full awareness. “If while washing dishes, we think only of the cup of tea that awaits us… we are sucked away into the future. Life is slipping away,” he writes.

we are sucked away into the future. Life is slipping away

Despite the growing popularity of mindfulness, many busy people still believe they don’t have time for it. But the beauty of this practice is that it can be seamlessly woven into our existing routines through small, doable steps like:

• Using waiting time to focus on your breath rather than reaching for your phone

• Eating one distraction-free meal a day with full sensory awareness

• Taking a “noticing walk” on your lunch break, observing sights and sounds

• Spending a few minutes with a guided meditation app before bed

These micro-practices may seem simplistic, but their cumulative effect over time is profound. Studies have linked mindfulness to reduced rumination, stress, emotional reactivity, increased focus, cognitive flexibility, and relationship satisfaction — the list goes on. As little as 2 weeks of 10 minutes per day of mindfulness practice can yield significant benefits.

The key is allowing ourselves small pockets of blankness and resisting the urge to compulsively fill them. When we befriend the gaps, we open ourselves to what Tolle calls “presence” — a state of relaxed, nonjudgmental attentiveness. In those spaces of stillness, fresh ideas and insights naturally arise, unforced by our usual mental strain. We reconnect with the natural ebb and flow of our own rhythms — with our innate okayness.

So the next time you find yourself itching to fill in the blanks out of habit, I invite you to experiment with lingering there a little longer. As you make peace with the silence and stillness, you just might hear the quiet murmurings of your wisest self. In the words of poet Wendell Berry, “Best of any song is bird song in the quiet, but first you must have the quiet.” Allow some unscribbled spaces in your day, and see what song emerges.

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Wisdom of Gaia

1. Wilson TD, Reinhard DA, Westgate EC, Gilbert DT, Ellerbeck N, Hahn C, Brown CL, Shaked A. Social psychology. Just think: the challenges of the disengaged mind. Science. 2014 Jul 4;345(6192):75–7. doi: 10.1126/science.1250830. PMID: 24994650; PMCID: PMC4330241.